To whom this may concern.
I am writing concerning a meat pie that I bought from my local shop which your company produce.
I have bought your pies for a number of years and I have always found them very enjoyable until today.
As I sat down to enjoy my meal while watching corrie as Friday night is pie and corrie night, my three year old daughter held something out to me, taking it out of her dainty little hand I found myself holding a piece of wood around half inch square, when I asked her where she had got it from she said it was in her pie.
Now in all fairness everyone knows wood should not be in a pie. My daughter could have choked or broken her little milk teeth not to mention she could have spit it out onto my new rug.
So in the hope that this does not happen again, as I really do wish to continue to buy your pies I must stress very strongly that I do not mind eating the horse but I completely as do the rest of my family refuse to eat the stable, although if I was to be honest the wood does look to be of good quality but as stated above I still refuse to eat it.
Could you please get back to me in respect of this matter and the steps that you will be taking to avoid this objectionable thing from happening again I look forward to hearing from you.
I really did send a letter similar to this 28 years ago but the letter I received back proved they didn’t share my sense of humour and I do continue to buy their pies