Many thanks for your letter regarding the complaint against my dog. I must say it came as no shock to me to hear that my animal barks, it fact it was one of the features I insisted on at purchase. I am somewhat surprised that my neighbours felt uneasy in coming to me with the problem in the first place – as I am now proud to say it has been several years since I stopped worshipping the devil and holding naked moonlight panda sacrifices on the street. I would be interested to hear from yourself, or indeed the complainant, on what action you think I should take over “the dog that barks”.
Dear Council Environment Department, December again and out come the Christmas light displays on local houses, bigger, bolder and more brash than last year. Isn’t it about time someone from the council took these households in hand and reminded them that using enough electricity to power a NASA space station for a year is Not [...]
